


Prove It

by fir8008



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-01
Updated: 2014-03-01
Packaged: 2018-01-14 03:41:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1251436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fir8008/pseuds/fir8008
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fanservice is practically written into the contract. Luhan says Sehun is his one and only. Insecurity is an ugly thing and it consumes Sehun. "Do you love me, hyung? Prove it."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Prove It

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted to AsianFanfics on February 25, 2013.

Sehun’s hands are shaking as he clutches the phone to his ear. Actually, his whole body is shaking as he struggles to express his emotions the other on the phone.  


He knows what fanservice is. He knows that doing fanservices is practically written into the contract all twelve of them signed. He knows that he shouldn’t be so insecure. All this he knows, but insecurity and jealousy fill him with so many doubts he feels like he’s drowning.  


He can’t even describe the ugly feelings he has when he monitors Exo-M’s performances on shows. He can’t even describe how it feels when he sees his Luhan touching his band mates – hugging them, rubbing against them, etc. He can’t even describe how empty he feels when he crawls into his bed at night. In the dark, his loneliness is oppressive and the tears start to leak out of his eyes. He muffles his sobs in a pillow so he doesn’t disturb the leader slumbering a few feet away. Every morning he wakes up with puffy eyes and sinus headaches. Every morning the pit in his heart seems to grow larger.  


Distance makes the heart grow fonder, they say.  


“Sehun-ah, this is ridiculous. You know that I love you. Don’t be silly, it’s just fanservice. You’re the only one I love.” Luhan’s voice is far away, but Sehun can make out the irritation coloring his voice. Sehun knows what Luhan has said to him, but the words echo in his brain differently: _You’re still a child. What do you know anyway? Don’t worry about me. Try not to be stupid_.  


There are so many things Sehun wants to say to Luhan: _Stop it, hyung, stop it. Stop flirting with everyone. I feel like I’m being stabbed every time I see you with someone else. I miss you, hyung. I miss you so much it hurts. Don’t make me insecure, hyung. Stop making me feel worthless, hyung. I can’t take this hyung. I can’t take this anymore. I feel like I’m dying, hyung. Don’t hurt me anymore, hyung. Do you really love me?_ He swallows the lump in his throat and tries to hold back his tears.  


“Sehun-ah,” Luhan clears his throat.  


“Yes, hyung?” Sehun’s throat burns. His cheeks are wet.  


“I love you.”  


Sehun snaps. “Prove it.” He slams down the receiver and screams. He sinks to his knees and screams out all of his pain and loneliness and emptiness and insecurity, screams until his throat is raw, screams until all of tears are gone. All of his K band mates have surrounded him, begging him to stop, to talk to them, _please maknae-ah tell us what’s wrong_. They’ve never seen him like this. Their bratty baby who rarely shows his emotions is just a mess on the kitchen floor, screaming like he’s filming a slice-and-dice horror film, screaming like his heart is breaking.  


When Sehun has finally stopped screaming, he’s mute. Chanyeol, being the strongest, picks Sehun up off the floor and carries him back to his room. Kai and Baekhyun fix Sehun’s bed and then collect all the stuffed animals in the dorm to surround him. They tuck Sehun in and Suho sits with him, stroking his hair and singing him a lullaby. D.O. is in the kitchen quickly preparing Sehun’s favorite foods and giving the other four a crash course in cooking. Sehun refuses to eat anything and buries himself under his blanket. Suho stays up all night, monitoring the lump, while the other four camp out outside the room, snoring discordantly together.  


Luhan doesn’t call him back.


End file.
